Keep On Living

One of the basic truths of life is to keep on living. We constantly need to feed our soul and mind with things that we relish so that we keep on living in a harmonious and peaceful way. It is said that nobody is perfect. What does that mean? Isn’t it a license to commit mistakes and not regretting them? Yes, it is. Living simply implies we must do our best in every aspect of life. But in hindsight, we may not always be able to achieve the desired result despite giving our best. Why so? Simply because nobody is perfect.

No matter how well trained we are, how smart we think of ourselves and how many experiences we have acquired in the journey of life, we will still commit some mistakes that will make us feel terrible. But then, desire of achieving perfection comes at a price. If something goes wrong we don’t need to put ourselves down. Every experience is like a wake up call. We can always consider the whys, how’s and what’s of an event gone wrong. It’s always in our hand to constructively evaluate ourselves and take the responsibility. We can always learn from whatever happened and move on.

I know it’s easier said than done. But every good thing comes at a price. There is no such thing as free lunch. So why not gear up yourself for the challenging but exciting ride ahead. After all, we need to keep on living.

Importance of Mistakes in Our Lives

We humans are great learners. We have mastered the art of improvising and improving. Despite that fact and our tendency of trying to attain perfection in whatever we do, we often end up making mistakes and regretting later on. There is not one person who hasn’t committed any mistakes. And if someone claims otherwise it simply means he hasn’t tried anything. We humans have been designed in such a way that learning process comes naturally to us. So many times these lessons are disguised in form of obstacles, mistakes and difficulties. But then, what is life without the iota of those failures. It is said that our difficulties teach us more than what our successes do.

How true! Mistakes are part of our lives and we will keep making mistakes till our last breath. But while mulling over our mistakes we often tend to undermine our success and other positive experiences. Can’t we just say to ourselves that yes, we made an experience instead of saying we made a mistake? Perhaps this single change of words will bring huge joy and pleasure in our lives. As they say, it’s all about matter of perception!

Mistakes are essential parts of our lives. They are an indicator of where we need to take a pause in the maddening rush of life and take care of the things that demand our urgent attention. They are simply a way to remind us not to let loose what you have earned and acquired over the years. Don’t deny this necessity of life. Accept its importance and take it as a gift. Rest will become very easy.

Acceptance of Self

The most important step one needs to take is to accept the fact that every individual is a different person and he or she has the perfect right to be his or her original self. We are proud of having been bestowed with freedom of choice and so are others. It’s our job to accept people as they are. Others are not bound to change themselves so that they could fit in the periphery of our choices. All the people have a choice of being the way they want to and we must surrender to this fact.

We need to remember that world was never created to please each one of us. It also implies that we need to adjust to the surrounding reality and get in tune with the world. let me tell you how it works. The moment we prepare ourselves to accept others’ reality, we are no longer burdened with any sort of expectations. Give people the right to be themselves and you will find yourself getting rid of monkey off your back. Expectations also imply that we think we have control over others but in reality we just have control over one person; and that’s you. So whatever you feel, however you behave and react, take responsibility for each one of them. These things are entirely our problem. Let each one of us take complete ownership of these feelings and have their movements restricted within us. Don’t ever think of spreading around your mess. That way, you will always be dependent on others. Soon enough, you will make this your habit to assimilate your feelings in your inner being and you will find yourself happily accepting feelings, desires, anger, rage, frustration, wants and likewise. Gradually self control will be a part of your lovely habits and you will be enjoying them.

The Virtue of Self-Control

Self control is not a common virtue. Humans in general tend to react more than act. Our behavior is subject to how others are reacting instead of how we want ourselves to behave all certain situations. Imagine, someone mimicking you in a group and everyone is laughing, imagine the drive on the road is driving too recklessly or slowly and because of that you are feeling perturbed, imagine your beloved nagging you n trifle issues and you feel all stressed up. So what happened in these conditions? The behavior of other people is driving your emotional and behavioral pattern. You are not in control of your own self.

Thinking of it, do we really have any control over what others think, behave, act or say? We don’t and we can not have. The point is, then we do we indulge in cribbing and screaming out other’s behavior? The anxiety caused by them is unintentional and yet who is getting affected? You and you alone. Sometimes, one even needs to visit a doctor because of the stress caused by others. So wouldn’t it be better for us to just accept the way people behave? One can not control others but yes we can have complete control over our reactions. It would not be such a great idea to have our life dependent on other’s reactions. People often complain about how others are unreasonable, unfair and that causes them stress and anxiety. So why not start some self-control measures and save yourself from similar fate.

Believing in yourself

“Believe in yourself” is one of the most common phrases that people hear all around; in books, in conversations, in stories, in television etc. This is because of the power that the meaning of these three words carries. Most famous personalities have believed in themselves and their philosophies right from Mahatma Gandhi ( On of the most respected of Indian freedom fighters ) to Barack Obama. Untill and unless, you have a strong conviction inside you, success is far away.

Even in organizations, people who rise to the top are people who believe in themselves. They have the power to give something new to the organization. They have the will and the determination to carry the organization in the right direction. Because people who believe in themselves are self motivated, they tend to be good leaders. They are in fact successful in the corporate training of employees in the organization.

Even a homemaker needs to believe in her actions to manage her tasks successfully. She believes that she can multi-task, she believes that she can carry on all her activities on time. It is this strong conviction that drives you to achieve what you want to. There are many people who always feel that they will not be able to do a particular task. This in itself is a de-motivating factor. There may be some genuine tasks that you may not be able to do. In other cases, you are able to achieve a lot by simply believing in yourself.

What did President Obama philosophize: Yes we can. What is this? Nothing but a strong belief in self that it is you who can make change happen by casting the correct vote. So the next time you are upto some task, just say “yes, I can because I believe in myself.

Sense of Freedom

The most crucial component of a relationship is feelings. These feelings are always at play no matter what type of relationship you share with different individual. This also gives us a clue about one element that is often ignored. And that element is as an individuals we possess very little self determination and control. It does not feel good to realize this truth but then ponder over this fact. Where is freedom? Our freedom goes for a toss when someone doesn’t react in an anticipated way. Words or looks from others make us feel happy or sad then is that really indicative of freedom? Where is the freedom when you have just returned from achieving something big and then people around you nullify that sense of achievement and all you are left with is sense of despondency? Where does freedom exist when success of your colleague or neighbor make you feel envious? No, that is not freedom.

In reality, we are never free because of the pull and push equation of different relationships in our lives. People around us determine our moods and motives. Not many of us give this fact a thought but probably reality bites. So what should we do? How can we get rid of feeling of attraction and repulsion and yet maintain the inner love. Don’t we have rights to remain free as in real value of the word? Shouldn’t we must be able to relate to others in freedom. That will provide us much needed balance in any sort of situation. Our primary aim should be to remain our own person with world in general!

Agony of Love

Now that we know the concept of relationships, how should we make relationships the source of joy and happiness? Can we replace rage, tension and grief that quite often emerge out of relationships, with happiness and peace? We all have relationships with different people in our lives like parents, siblings, friends, lover, colleagues, boss or teachers etc. Quite often we manipulate them or vice versa, bully or being bullied etc but one feeling is common and that is of helplessness. Rather call it dependence on others for our happiness.

Most of us have already experienced the beautiful feeling of love. Ever wondered what actually happens when you are in love? One single person starts affecting our lives so strongly. He or she becomes the single biggest source for our happiness. We try our best to please that person, to be with him/her, to be loved by the person and all these for what? To see the relationship last long! This one relationship makes us aware of a wide gamut of emotions including, love, joy, affection, tension, grief, pity, rage, excitement and frustration etc.

Now think about it! In reality you are in a love relationship and yet what you experience is pain. See the irony! So when pain has become such integral part of the love, did it remain love? How can it be? So what exactly we start experiencing? Well, it’s nothing but play of our imagination and needs of our own ego! What had started as love is no longer love but just fulfillment of our desires and our ego! Think about it!